In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Randomize
