p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
