So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Randomize
