margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Randomize
