Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Randomize