I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
You were trust falling into bushes
You peed on a flamingo?!?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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