also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
