oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
