No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
