My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
