had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
