why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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