halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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