I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize