I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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