Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i just ordered a pitcher of margaritas for me and a friend but she called and canceled. oh well, looks like im getting trashed alone.
the waiter who hardly speaks english told me "i go get your medicine now"
this medicine is soooo good.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Randomize
