Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
