its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
