my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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