I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
