So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
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