eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
