I just saw a hot homeless man
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Randomize
