she kept yelling 'call me bella'
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize
