DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
