The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
operation harelip BJ is a go
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
