Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
