Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Let's get the cat blown out
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize