fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
