We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
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