We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
