he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
