woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
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