Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Randomize
