This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
