Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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