new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
