Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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