I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I need a beard to bite.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
