This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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