dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
