The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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