using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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