since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
