i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
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