dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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