tell your sister to shave her snatch
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
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