Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize