That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
