please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
