I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
